creepypastafandomcom-20200222-history
User talk:CloudtheEevee
Story deletion Your story has been deleted because it doesn't meet the wiki's minimum quality standards. Please revise your story accordingly before trying to reupload it again, through Deletion Appeal. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO REUPLOAD YOUR PASTA. If you upload it again without any major changes, you'll receive a 1-day ban from editing, as per the rules. Read for further details on how you can improve your story/stories to make them meet our quality standards. "You know why he's here? Why he's investigating the broken rules? He's not paid or anything. He likes it. He gets off on it" (talk) 01:04, July 6, 2014 (UTC) RE With that kind of attitude, I won't be explaining anything to you. Also, read my talk page header. [[User:Princess Callie|'Dashie']] [[User talk:Princess Callie|''~20% Cooler~]] 00:36, July 7, 2014 (UTC) this kind of aditude comes from me reading the rules and having them ripped up in my face. do you even read my pasta? compare the 2 other versions to this one. you see major changes, also wtf thinks im investagating the "BROKEN RULES" im just trying to post a pasta and you people keep deleting my hard earned work. i think i deserve some explanation. Here, then Alright, here is your explanation. Your story was genuinely terrible. It was rushed and close to anticlimactic, and it rambles on about all these different things that don't matter to the story. There was HARDLY a plot. You kept jumping ship from one thing to another and your order of events was completely mixed up. You raise questions and then answer them with more raised questions in your story and you describe only the most minor of things while effectively refusing to clarify the major plot points. You also had multiple run on sentences, as well as grammatical and dialogue errors. There's your explanation. [[User:Princess Callie|'Dashie']] [[User talk:Princess Callie|~20% Cooler~]] 00:49, July 7, 2014 (UTC) on project seven? are you seriously telling me that it was taken down because you think it wasnt good? can i atleast get that whole story back in text so i can edit it or somehting? cause i put so much time and effort into this one story and you just take it down. i completely rewrote the story whithout saving it and posted it directly, the other time i copied it from my earlier versions. :You will have to ask a different admin for a pastebin link. I can't do anything from my windows phone other than read, delete, and occasionally edit. [[User:Princess Callie|'Dashie']] [[User talk:Princess Callie|~20% Cooler~'']] 00:58, July 7, 2014 (UTC) :who can i ask? ::Here: http://pastebin.com/1R9H5FCi ::And I too can vouch that the story was terrible. It wasn't taken down because she "didn't think it was good", but because it didn't meet even the most basic of quality standards. ::LOLSKELETONS (talk) 01:04, July 7, 2014 (UTC) More feedback :I also did a review of your story for the deletion appeal. Looking over both reiterations of your story, I can't help put notice the large number of capitalization ("I" not "i", a number of times where you fail to capitalize the first word in a sentence, and names missing capitalization specifically Will), punctuation (Commas needed in certain sentences.), run on sentences, ("Well now that that is out of the way im(sic) currently writing this blog to tell you about what happened here, i(sic) decided not to post it to any CDC website or anything because im(sic) afraid they will destroy the only evidence of the outbreaks (sic) origin, it all began with project seven.") and grammatical errors ("It's=it is, its=possession). These errors are rampant and really detract from the story. :Onto the story, the concept of a super-soldier serum is interesting, but it is mentioned only once and never really delved into again. I assume you were going for a science (experiment) pasta, but the lack of specifics draws from the story. How does Rosario-K make them a super-soldier? (Promotes acuity, muscular growth?) The lack of explanation, other than them having no pupils (Unfortunately description of the eye has become a cliche in and of itself.). By the way, the inability for miosis and mydriasis means they are light-blind or cannot see in normal light (Not really super-soldier material...). :Onto why this story was deleted three separate times. I agree with the other admin's decision to delete this due to severe grammatical issues that are present in the story and the blurb I included. I am attaching a copy of the story (http://pastebin.com/UmqbyAUu) I would suggest taking it to the writer's workshop for a more in-depth analysis to help correct some of the issues I listed and any more I may have missed. Do not re-upload this story without doing that and seeking an admin's permission to see if it is up to Quality Standards. Reuploading the story without that will get you banned for a day. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:14, July 7, 2014 (UTC) :oh shit your right. never really dived into the whole Rosario-K thing, i might rewrite it another time and make rosario k some kind of cure for it, expanding on how it can promote acuity and muscular growth. im taking inspiration from the creepypasta Zombie Outbreak 2012 next time, wait about a week or so to hear from me again unless i need some advice reminder The best way to save your progress on your work is to save the document whenever you are done revising. That way you won't lose all your work. The ending, in particular, I thought could use some revision. Also, to reiterate PrincessCallie's point; there was quite a few plot issues, the dialogues was sometimes hard to follow. And some parts seemed to be out of order. SoPretentious | (talk) 01:02, July 7, 2014 (UTC) what was so bad about the ending? it wasn't so bad. I have seen much worse endings, but to me it seemed rushed. other parts of the story were more exciting, and the end seemed to be missing excitement. The main character hadn't changed his mannerisms at all towards the end. He still is the same character and is relatively calm about becoming a "zombie". Rushed and somewhat predictable endings take away from Creepypasta. SoPretentious | (talk) 01:36, July 7, 2014 (UTC)